Let's Talk Porn: Sex Workers, Expectations and Addiction

Before the internet granted us 24/7 access to porn, there were DVDs. Before DVDs, there were VHS tapes. Before that, photos. As soon as humanity was able to capture images on film, the medium was used to depict sex. It isn’t new and it never seems to get old, which is to say, it doesn’t seem to be going anywhere. On the contrary, pornography use is on the rise, in no small part due to the triple A’s: greater accessibility, affordability (it’s largely free!), and anonymity. Given that it’s such an enduring phenomenon, it warrants a real conversation. Or a thousand conversations. Sure, there have been academic papers and religious right narratives floating around the subject, but since porn continues to become more mainstream, there simply isn’t enough open and honest dialogue that reflects its rising consumption. So, let’s do it. Let’s real-talk porn. 

It goes without saying that your relationship with porn is a deeply personal investigation as is the journey with being, or wanting to become, more sex-positive. No two perspectives are going to be exactly alike. For many folks, watching porn is a healthy, integral part of their sex life. For others, it’s a thing they struggle with for various reasons including escapism or addiction. But what’s important to note is that “porn” isn’t one big homogenous mass. There’s no denying that on the whole, it’s an industry driven by the male-lens, and this male-centric mainstream porn is what dominates popular tube sites. But there are female, non-binary, and queer pornographers out there, making innovative, creative porn that does its own thing. So taking a critical look at the porn industry doesn’t mean having a black or white, clear, irrefutable stance on things or having all of the answers. It simply means showing up as the mature, conscientious adults we are and figuring out for ourselves where we land. Viewpoints can have nuances and one can concede the problematic aspects of the porn industry while still finding it’s something they enjoy. Meaning, you can be anti-porn and still like some porn, you can be sex-positive and be anti-porn, you can be pro-porn and hate most porn and what it represents, but enjoy the idea of it. Maybe where you land is pro-porn reform. Simply put, there are no neat boxes to check, and your relationship to porn can be as straightforward or as complex as feels right.

The idea that you can dislike porn and still support sex workers may feel like a contradiction to some. No matter where you stand, you can appreciate, support, and acknowledge the labor, craft, and artistry of the performers, while still taking a critical look at the industry en masse. Known to be poorly regulated, there’s something to be said about the exploitative or abusive aspects of the industry, especially since the average reported age for women entering the industry is as young as 22. Many women have reported a lack of consent, physical coercion, and violence on sets. For these reasons, not to mention greater financial agency, more and more performers are choosing to make their own content. And for some people, this seems like a safer way of supporting sex workers whilst still consuming porn. Unfortunately, as a society, we don’t protect sex workers and this breeds a lack of transparency on the nature of sex work, including being on these content platforms. Is it all liberated sexual expression and a free choice market or is it a bleak reality for those doing the work? Is it somewhere in between? Food for thought.